Saturday Night Live took a break from politics this week to instead bring viewers “live” coverage of the Johnny Depp vs. Amber Heard “cuckoo” lawsuit.
“I know this isn’t the most relevant story right now,” Kate McKinnon said, as MSNBC’s Nicolle Wallace said at the top of the cold open sketch. “But with all the trouble in the world, it’s not nice to have a news story that we can all look at together and say, ‘Oh, glad it’s not me?'”
The sketch focused on the lecherous claim that Heard had left “fecal matter” in Depp’s bed, imagining the moment his various household staff discovered the “dookie” in question.
When Heard’s attorney objected that it had nothing to do with Depp’s guilt or innocence, Cecily Strong’s judge replied, “That’s true, but I’ll allow it. Because it does sound fun and this test is for fun.”
Kyle Mooney, meanwhile, did his best to embody Depp’s grinning responses to the lawyers’ questions. “Mr. Depp, do you find this trial amusing?” the judge asked. “A little, yes,” he replied.
“Okay, I think I’ve seen enough,” the judge finally concluded. “This trial has given me a lot to think about. On the one hand, I believe Mr. Depp’s story, but on the other, your constant little grin lets me know that this isn’t the first woman you’ve made so angry that she shit in your bed.”
“I think I’m known as a… complete nightmare,” Depp said in response, putting on his sunglasses, to which the judge said, “Okay, okay, anyway, I’m just so glad I didn’t. am.”
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